Marriage Minute: The Custom Order Husband

changeHave you ever wanted to change your husband? You know — wished that you could take him back to God and put in a work order?

“Okay, God, I’d like to change this and this, and a little bit of that…”

Or WORSE…have you ever wished you could trade him in and get a custom order husband perfectly suited to your needs? We can’t do that, of course. And I think that dwelling on all those “changes” we’d like to make is a good way to end up in marital counseling — or even, divorce court!

In our early days of marriage, how often I WISHED there were SOMEONE that I could run to and tattle on my husband. “Do you know what he did?? He is so unfair!!” A pastor? A parent? SOMEONE?? Of course, we can’t do that either! (There are several reasons–not the least of which is the damage that will do to your marital relationship.)

However, there IS one person we can run to, any time we feel discouraged, slighted, angry, or hurt.

My husband and I will be celebrating our 15th anniversary in about a month. We have both changed so much since our wedding day. My husband has changed A LOT, particularly in the last three years, and let me tell you — it’s all God. GOD HAS DONE THAT. It hasn’t been for anything that I have done–except perhaps by standing back, praying for my husband, and allowing God to work in his life. Because GOD?? God changes people, from the inside out. He’s the only one who can.

God is the person you can run to when you feel like life, or your husband, is unfair. God is the person you can run to when you are hurt or angry or lonely. God is constant, trustworthy and faithful. Give your husband, and your marriage, over to the Lord in prayer, lay it at His feet, and let him work on it. I’m here today as testimony that God can do amazing things in your marriage if you give it over to Him and ask Him to work on it.

But God isn’t a same-day-service kind of God. He works in His own timing. As God works on your husband’s heart–and yours–you may become discouraged that things aren’t changing as fast as you’d like.

Don’t despair. Do not grow weary in doing good.

Trust God. Let him work on your husband’s heart. You can’t change it, but God can. Let God work on your heart — because you can work on that, and you can grow, too. Trust Him with your marriage. He will always be there for you.

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:6-7

For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.” Isaiah 41:13

The Lord is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him. Psalm 28:7

Marriage Minute

MMM

 

Image Background Source: Blue Morpho Butterfly by Vera Kratochvil

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Marlene
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Marlene

It is an amazing thing what we see when we learn to trust God and His timing. I am by nature, an impatient person…so this has been a lesson I have had to learn, and it was hard. There is an amazing amount of peace found in that trust..doesn’t mean it won’t be harder some times than others, but it makes a whole lot of difference!