Before Spring Break we had a scare here at our house. A scare that taught me a valuable lesson, and reminded me of some infallible truths.
We live in the country, and while I was making lunch my three children were playing outside together. I keep the doors and one eye open while they do, but in one brief moment Little Prince had followed a big sister who went too far and then wandered down the long driveway and into the county road.
In a terrifying moment I heard Princess screaming for me at the end of the driveway and hollering for Little Prince to come back because a car was coming. As I flew out the door towards my baby, I couldn’t see him through the trees that line the road on either side of the driveway, I couldn’t see the car, I knew nothing.. except that my baby was in danger.
With my heart in my stomach and my stomach in my throat, barefoot and not-caring, I ran like I’ve never run before – Ever. In seconds I had my baby in my arms, who was thankfully safe, and clutching him tightly I walked back to our yard, now feeling every rock under my bare feet. Once back inside our own yard I crashed to my knees with him and began to tremble. He looked at me with wide eyes and said only “Scared.”
I began to cry and thank God that He had protected my child.
I also thought about what could have happened and about how I would have been completely responsible. And about how God has entrusted me with this little life and I’m responsible for it, and if something HAD happened and I had lost him, I knew in my heart that I would not have been satisfied with how much of myself and my time I had invested in him, teaching him about God, loving him, in the small amount of time that I’d had.
Which of course made me cry more.
But the fact is that even though I couldn’t see my baby when I ran out the door, God could. God always will. There will be times in my son’s life when I won’t be able to protect him. There will be times that I won’t be there when danger arises. I need to remember to entrust my child to God. And I can trust God, I have to trust God, in his sovereign grace and wisdom – no matter what happens. What happens may not always be what I want to happen. But I still have to trust and have faith God.
Thinking about what could have happened, and knowing that I haven’t taken hold of every moment that I’ve had with my son, gave me perspective. We know that we won’t have our children here at home forever. They will grow up. They will have homes and families of their own. But we aren’t even guaranteed that. We don’t know how long we have. I don’t want to look back, at any point in my child’s life, and feel like I’ve wasted the time I have with any of my children.
What happened that day was terrifying. Still today, I’m incredibly thankful that he kept my son safe. Still today, my son talks about the scary car – which is pretty remarkable for a two year old. I’m so thankful that He taught both of us something that day.
God is faithful. God is trustworthy. God is good.